Life is a banquet, and most poor bastards are starving to death.
AmomentOfRelief
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Name: Alex
Birthday: 9/16/1986


Occupation: Retired
Industry: Entertainment


Message: message me


Member Since: 5/4/2003

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drunk on the roof and yelling at god
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Wednesday, May 09, 2007

I shift and grow

aggressively...
regressing

blooming
wilting

perhaps I have confused the aforementioned with the present. I am far from stuck, I am motion.

I agree, your aura is not edgy enough to be noticed. Why the fuck is aura still a concern?
Wilting
Dialog has long since ceased

Shift...yes, my paradigm has. In most every way. Communication, love, recognition, trust, I now engage myself in these more fully. So drastically I feel ashamed of how I have in the past. I am ashamed.

There are staples that remain as they always will.                            

My sweet ass bed head
labeling kitchen accessories                                              Small and large
Nobility
Pride
 
So much that needs to be extinguished. I have an abundant amount to articulate and too much of the last to properly address it to those that need to hear it.

I think far too much. I'm sure we both do. I'm sure we all do.

when
"I love you..."
I lied.

A term tossed around so frivolously I'm ill.

So many times I wish I hadn't.
I didn't
I wouldn't
I couldn't

Bitter
I think you are.

I feel guilty for not caring, even though I don't think I should.

I have very little to conceal. I can only imagine how many times words and thoughts have concerned me.

All it feeds now is creativity.

Is it the impossibility which makes it romantic? I'm not sure.

When will you be beautiful again?
Will you ever be appeased?
What would that person say? The one that took you seriously.

If you wonder why I smiled. It was the fabric.

I certainly do apologize.

It really isn't so dramatic.

_________________________

I really do apologize for the above.




Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Currently Listening
Give Up
By The Postal Service
see related
ahemm....

Apathetic.
indeed...

stir CRAZY
need something new...NOW!!!

I bore easily. At least I finally played my music for someone(s) other than myself.

Almost 21....old

School needs to go away...
That way i can be motivated to do it again.

lets face it school, I just don't care about you the way I used to, and you know that. I've been thinking about it for a few months now, and I'm just feeling smothered. I think we should take a break, just a little one. And if it is meant to be it will.





Friday, March 09, 2007

before you find flaws...There are no accidents, or mistakes for that matter

In this chair, i feel so small...
you live, learn, and love again...again...again...and now I am tired or repeating myself.


I lack ambiguity, but perhaps I could be decent yet.
Who am I deceiving? 
Instead of myself being let down, lets let this head on collision destroy us both.









" Need me to fall down, so you can climb up
Some fool ass ladder, well good luck
I hope there's something better up there."

"one day anyone died i guess
(and noone stooped to kiss his face)
busy folk buried them side by side
little by little and was by was
all by all and deep by deep
and more by more they dream their sleep"


Friday, February 23, 2007

"I think I contradict myself.
Very well, I contradict myself."


Monday, February 12, 2007

Chemicals

There have been very few constants in life. Things change. It appears that in some lives nothing is static, people exiting too soon, drifting and fading in and out of your life, and you tend to be in the middle of a tug-of-war and both sides seem like they would like to let go, so you start pulling them both closer. You try to identify something constant, something reliable, and the only thing that is constant that is always present is the first and forementioned. So keep company with the evil that took everyone away to begin with. You forsake your most personal of relationships, and you become the demon father (or was it your mother?) figure. Drifting, escaping, running, finding refuge and refuse in the bottom of bottles and ashtrays. Emotion and being as vapid as the curling smoke drifting out of your mouth. You are your own broken promises. Just like your lineage before, except the only one letting you down now...is yourself.

You give up one evil and replace it with another, and make up for the others absence by engaging in the new more frequently, in order to match the first, and now we are back to square one. How do you justify this to yourself now? New playmates with the same face just different names. Now, what to fill the glass with?

Where is your insight? Oh, I have not lost sight, my dear, I have seen where you dance, and I've played where you play. I have lain in gutters as well. I've been too curious not to be street smart. I've told your half-truths. When does it begin and where does it end? How much can you care before you realize there is nothing you can do? How sad it is to see another fall. Oh, I have lost many comrades, and I have almost fallen once or twice myself. I wish your character could be as strong, perhaps it is there somewhere. Its not the loved ones judging and not accepting you again, but I understand your dependancy is blinding, and this time you are not being forsaken. You are forsaking yourself.



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